Lately a few things come to me until I don't know if I should laugh or... I seriously don't know. My life is like literally the biggest troll, ever.
Somewhere at some time I met the troll halfway, he instantly fell in love with my imbalanced, electrifying eyes. He couldn't get over that poker face of mine. I caught his eye, among millions of people in the world. He portrayed me as his goddess, the love of his life. He also thinks that I need someone to always be with me because I am special. He instantly concluded that, he could be the one for me. So here comes the troll tailing at the back of me. He knows that I don't like it, but when the time is wrong, he will go..
I feel as confused, and somewhat lost with no words could describe. I can neither tell you how it is nor how it feels like. It isn't something traumatic, but..yea.
When I tell people I am the only child in my family, usually they will reply with,
"Awwww, your parents princess!"
"Oh, no wonder, so spoilt/clumsy/blur/unalert" (insert any other stereotypes)
Or just envy from people who have siblings (of course, people around my age) and their complains of their siblings and double standards from their parents.
Like many kids around, I will have that phase of desperately wishing for a sibling. A permanent companion to play with. Kids, what the hell do we know? Mummy and daddy have been playing a game of treasure hunt with you, hide the debts somewhere, in a treasure box, just deep enough for you to discover it when you get older, heh.
17 years later I only realized my wish has came true long time ago.
Enough said.
So yeah I have to change my introduction: I am the youngest child in my family. I have a step bro and step sis at 27 and 25 years old respectively. My bro (uhhh.... ) looks just like my dad haha. Might meet him this CNY. Hmm. As for my sis no news of her.
Truthfully I wasn't that mindfucked because I remember dreaming about dad telling me this. IKR wtf @___@
For me the only slight unfortunate part is I didn't get to bond with them at all, now they are too old for me to hang out with <.<
On the bright side?
1. At least my wish did came true.. just that I never knew then. LOL
2. Didn't have to share my stuff. Sharing is caring, yes, but I don't wanna share everything, especially a room and a computer :X
3. Most importantly, no mind fucking double standards. = less arguments in the house = peace.
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Went to the hospital again for a follow up appointment by my previous idiotic, ignorant doctor last year. Initially I refused because I instantly lost hope with the service I got. Turns out that the doctors in the sports department (wtf, yes, sports. Someone who barely does sports actually had to be there) are changed every week :O *phew*
I am glad to be attended by someone who you will automatically call a professional. K my blood test results are out..
The doc said everything is fine, except that I am rheumatoid positive. He called the rheumatologist immediately because it is usually linked to other medical issues (shit.) but the department wanted a recommendation letter (something liddat) so have to wait for the hospital to send an appointment letter to my doorstep. Funny right? Why can't they just call .__.
The pig is diagnosed w rheumatoid arthritis.
So how did I take the news?
I didn't show expression on the outside. but inside I was like wtfwtfwtfwtfwtf. Basically, this described how I was perfectly.
Realized how we often think in memes now? @__@
Too young to get it? You are wrong. It can happen to anyone at any age.
Most epic part? Only 1 percent of the population gets it. No cure, only steps to delay the process of fucking me up. God I am so fucking lucky. Bless all the leprechaun in the parallel universe.
One thing I find a bit.. amusing (???) is that in HUKM, there will be a flock of medical students surrounding you will look like your audience in your drama show. All 6 pairs (the last visit there were more) of eyes will be locked at you, and when the doctors say something, everyone reacts. When the doc announced my *cough* flattering results everyone behind had their jaws dropped. Someone even ooh-ed at it. .__.
I can't say I am a positive person. I admit, I am considered negative. :( But I know the consequences of it-- the main one is hurting my loved one. Therefore in these two years I tried to find the bright sides/parts of the whole situation. Telling myself, it could have been worse. Or point out random stupid things around me. There are many ways to be more optimistic, if you can't take any lies to yourself. :D In the end, everything is in your hands. You will be the one who choose the path to go. You are the only one who can make yourself happier in the situation.
However, I have much hope that rheumatoid arthritis can be cured completely in the future-- look at how technology fly sky high :D
that's all folks, toodleees
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